This week on Shotgun – Mike Schwarz prepared for his shot at Bobby Gunns’ wXw Unified World Wrestling Championship, and had to negotiate some big scares…
Well, I jinxed it didn’t I? Just days after writing how Shotgun was a “wXw NOW-exclusive”, it was reported that Shotgun was going to appear on the WWE Network. In lieu of any announcement, I can only assume that wXw NOW is where it’ll appear first – so head over to wXwNOW.de – the subscription is $11 a month, and includes a lot of the wXw back catalog, along with shows from other promotions.
Ivan Kiev pinned Vincent Heisenberg in 5:30 (**½)
Killer Kelly submitted Goldenboy Santos in 7:30 (***)
Hektor Invictus pinned Jurn Simmons in 6:02 (**¾)
Metehan defeated The Rotation via referee stoppage in 6:37 to retain the wXw Shotgun Championship (***)
We start with a recap of the Rotation and his quest for a crack at the Shotgun title. Metehan laughed him off… then we segued to Rambo telling Metehan about a rumour that Rotation was supposedly spreading.
Then we got to Absolute Andy’s office where EZEL walk in. Of course Metehan’s pissed. He wants to wrestle Rotation, or else he’ll break Rotation’s legs. Andy makes the match, as long as it’s for the Shotgun title… oh, and he suspends Abdul and Aytac for their attack last week.
Cue titles, cue Sebastian Hollmichel on commentary, as he runs down tonight’s card. Five matches on tap – it’s loaded!
Of course they take us back to last week’s main event, which left Norman Harras feeling a little rough. They show the dog food that he ate, because he didn’t Winalot, but maybe that’ll take the leash off of him? That segues into the Raucherpause, with Bobby Gunns reminiscing over the fine steak he had the other night. Of COURSE they poke fun at Norman. Prince Ahura gets a good one in as they keep needling Norman. Ah, he’s a good boy for going through with all of this.
Outside the Steffy, Mike Schwarz is arriving… and he’s attacked by Abdul and Aytac. Clearly their suspension doesn’t reach the outside of the venue. They stretch his arms on the steps outside the Steffy, and smash an exhaust into the limb before running off. That’s a bloody unique weapon… and that’s two weeks in a row we might be losing a title match because of EZEL.
Avalanche and Vincent Heisenberg are chatting about recovering from injury. Apparently Heisenberg is facing Ivan Kiev, and his game plan is to keep Ivan grounded… Avalanche gives him some tips, like the good coach he is, warning Heisenberg to keep him away from the ropes.
Ivan Kiev vs. Vincent Heisenberg
Heisenberg gets us going with a lock-up as he charged Kiev into the corner. A waistlock takedown’s next before they reached a stand-off.
Heisenberg looks for an armbar, taking down Kiev, before he locked in a sleeperhold… but it ends in the ropes as Kiev quickly showed that Avalanche was right. An eye rake from Kiev breaks it up, before he took Heisenberg into the corner with some right hands. There’s an Irish whip reversal, but Kiev floats over the Hamburg native… who caught him, but couldn’t avoid an O’Connor roll for a two-count. A head kick’s next for another two-count from Kiev, as Heisenberg struck back, charging him into the corner with an elbow, before another splash kept him there. A third one backfires as a shoulder charge sees Heisenberg hit the steel, with Kiev coming back in with a slingshot dropkick from the apron for a near-fall.
Heisenberg hits a German suplex as commentary tells us that Mike Schwarz has been carted off to hospital. Kiev hotshots Heisenberg from the floor, again proving Avalanche right, before he hit a front kick and a flying ‘rana that took the big lad down. Kiev sizes up Heisenberg, but gets caught on the top rope as the newcomer brings him down with a superplex for a two-count of his own. From there, Heisenberg goes for a slam, but Kiev slips out and hits a Pele kick. Another trip up top for Kiev is caught, but he pushes Heisenberg down after some headbutts, before taking off with a Blockbuster for the win. Kiev made short work of him, and Avalanche won’t be happy that his game plan wasn’t stuck to. **½
Hey, we’re backstage as Avalanche is debriefing Heisenberg. Avalanche tells Vincent he nearly had Kiev’s number, but to keep working hard. Heisenberg really didn’t want to hear any of this… and I’m enjoying seeing these chats. Career growth and all that. And then… whack. Norman Harras attacks Avalanche from behind with… is that a dog chain?! Oh Norman, you’re not doing yourself any favours. He throws a dog collar at Avalanche, who’s left laying as we fade out.
They replay Dirty Dragan getting attacked by EZEL last week… and how Emil Sitoci cancelled the tag title match for now. They also show the Pretty Bastards celebrating Norman Harras, pre-dog food, of course… and then we see the Bastards reminiscing over the time wXw “didn’t want us to be here.” I mean, yeah, they were kicked off the main roster for bad performance. They talk about how they have no number one contenders, thanks to Norman, but stop themselves short so that he doesn’t get a big head.
We’ve a Goldenboy Santos promo. He’s here to tell us he’s not cocky or arrogant, but rather the man who puts “the pro in professional wrestling.” There’s footage of him on the basketball court, before he tells us how he left Portugal behind to chase his dream of being a professional wrestler. That sounds familiar… he’s close to meeting his dream, but he’s not gonna stop. Good stuff to introduce Santos to a newer crowd.
We’re backstage as Avalanche is licking his wounds. Anil Marik walks in and suggests getting Avalanche checked out… Avalanche tries to blow it off, but Anil talks him around, and it’s off to the very-busy Oberhausen hospital they go.
Nico Schmidt is with Killer Kelly ahead of her match with Goldenboy Santos. She’s excited, but Santos wanders in to tell her he’ll rip her head off of her shoulders. A friendly rivalry, as they say!
Goldenboy Santos vs. Killer Kelly
It’s a first-time meeting, and you can sense that this is a big deal for Santos.
They slap hands at the start, as we open with a lock-up with Kelly getting charged into the corner, where Santos breaks cleanly. A waistlock from Kelly is a fake out for a cravat, but Santos lifts her up and drops her onto the top turnbuckle for a break. Kelly tries to sting Santos with kicks to the quad, before she leapt up and grabbed a sleeperhold… but Santos backs into the corner to break, only to miss a quick charge in as Kelly reapplies the cravat. Knees follow as Santos was trapped, before a bicycle kick sent him sailing to the outside. The Cristiano is teased, but Santos caught Kelly and spun her onto the apron with a back suplex, as he looked to take the win via count-out. Commentary tells us here that the Gunns/Schwarz match is off, as Santos toys with Kelly with a spin-around gutwrench suplex a la Timothy Thatcher for another two-count.
A right hand knocks Kelly down as Santos keeps pushing on, but Kelly fought back from her knees, only to get slammed down. It’s another two-count for Goldenboy, who then charged Kelly into the corner. She breaks free and unloads with some elbows, before Santos pushed her down. Kelly’s holding her elbow as she tries to fight back, but she’s lifted to the top rope. She manages to catch Santos in a Dragon sleeper in the corner, before flipping into a Diamond Dust – not seen that in a while! Shades of Shibata follows as she’s clearly in discomfort… but she can’t follow up with the Vale da Morte, and ends up getting pulled into Santos’ own death valley driver for a near-fall.
Santos is beside himself, but he takes too long to follow up with a clothesline as Kelly ducks and applies a mounted sleeperhold… Santos splats back to break it up, but Kelly powers up into a Dragon Sleeper for the submission. This was a good match for the time they had – fortunately the injury to Kelly wasn’t as bad as it could have been, and all credit to them for keeping going in spite of it all. ***
They replay Avalanche getting attacked with a dog chain, before we see Andy asking Siri to “call Annoying Norman.” He wants to see him… but this time Harras doesn’t want to come now he’s actually invited.
We’re outside the Steffy as Mike Schwarz is here, wrist taped-up and all. Bobby Gunns crows over the injury, suggesting Schwarz hurt himself going home from the pub, but Mike reckons he’ll be able to go tonight.
We’re back in the office as Norman Harras arrives. Absolute Andy is livid because Norman is hurting an already-depleted roster… and because of the dog collar earlier, Andy suggests a dog collar match when Avalanche is fit. Norman doesn’t get a chance to protest, and this is how you progress a storyline!
They replay Mike Schwarz getting attacked with an exhaust, as he’s next to see Andy in the office. He’s begging to have his match, because he’s got one good arm, but Andy won’t let him wrestle unless he’s cleared.
More replays recap the Marius al-Ani/Jurn Simmons stuff from the past few weeks, which leads to tonight’s match as Marius’ training partner Hektor was talked into facing the Dutchman. Hektor has an interview with Nico Schmidt next, ahead of the match, as he reckons he’ll be able to build on his showing at 16 Carat Gold, and his placing as a finalist in the Shotgun title tournament, with a win here.
Hektor Invictus vs. Jurn Simmons
Jurn’s back for another match then, having been talked into his last one by Absolute Andy.
Jurn shoves Hektor away from the opening lock-up, before he shrugged off a waistlock attempt. A side headlock’s pushed off, but Jurn’s back with a shoulder tackle as he seemed bemused by Hektor’s early offence. Hektor’s O’Connor roll went nowhere, but he’s able to catch Jurn with a kick to the gut before Marius al-Ani came out to spectate. A powerbomb’s countered with a back body drop, but Hektor holds on for a sunset flip for a two-count… only for Jurn to come right back with a big boot. He noticed Marius, but didn’t get too distracted as he threw Hektor across the ring with a no-bump suplex… then hurled him into the turnbuckles with an Irish whip.
Hektor bounces back with a clothesline in the corner before he ate a front kick and a lariat for a two-count. An attempt at a knee strike is caught as Jurn countered with a spinebuster for a two-count, before a press slam attempt went nowhere. Another running kick from Hektor stops Jurn, who then caught a Pele kick and clobbered Hektor with another clothesline… that adds another near-fall, before a spear led to Marius laughing at Jurn for not getting the job done. Schadenfreude. Not the group.
Jurn gets distracted at Marius, as he poses at “the bodeh”… Marius hops up on the apron, but does nothing as Hektor was just about stirring. So Jurn applies an ankle lock to Hektor, but it’s countered with a roll-up as Hektor snatches the win at the six minute mark. This told a pretty good story – echoing what happened in Kutenholz, with Jurn on course to win before Marius al-Ani cost him yet again. **¾
We get a replay of Rambo telling Metehan of Rotation’s insult… and the set-up to tonight’s new main event. Nico Schmidt interviews the Rotation next, asking him why he chose to insult Metehan’s mum… but this is the first he’s hearing of it. Rotation vehemently denies that, only saying that Metehan’s mum couldn’t be proud of him. Rotation realises that he’s now got a big target on his back, but he ignores it because he’s got a shot at the Shotgun title.
wXw Shotgun Championship: The Rotation vs. Metehan (c)
Rotation has been stuttering a little since 16 Carat Gold – and this would be a big upset if he walked away with gold.
Metehan roughs up Rotation before the bell, and they start by trading punches, before Metehan properly gave Rotation a kicking. A vicious back elbow off the ropes keeps the fight-like feel going, before a bodyslam took it right back to wrestling as Metehan calmed down a little.
An elbow takes Rotation into the corner, as Metehan was measuring his shots a little here. Rotation tries to maker a fight back, but he spins into a uranage before some double stomps left Rotation writhing. They head to the corner, where Rotation ducks a chop, but ends up getting pulled into the corner with a Flatliner, before a missile dropkick to the back left him bouncing to the mat. Metehan gets a two-count, but the crossface afterwards ends in the ropes as Metehan then looked for a slingshot DDT… but he’s caught with a roll-up as Rotation nearly got the upset. A wind-up palm strike to the chest is next from Metehan, before Rotation flipped out of a back suplex… more chops and elbows from Rotation keep it going, before a dropsault took Metehan down.
Rotation’s lifted onto the apron, where he hits a gamengiri and a springboard ‘rana, taking Metehan outside for a step-up flip senton. Back inside, Rotation hits another springboard dropkick for a two-count, before he went up top in search of his Victory Over Gravity… but he misses the 450 splash, and gets caught with a slingshot DDT from Metehan. From there, a teardrop suplex throws Rotation across the ring, as Metehan looked for the KO… but instead went for the pin, as Rotation kicks out! A neck crank’s next out of Metehan as he throws in some Danielson elbows, laying out Rotation until the referee waved off the match. This was a good little scrap with the Rotation holding his own, but in the end it was Metehan’s aggression that won out. ***
After the match, Metehan tried to take it out on Rotation again, but Killer Kelly, Stephanie Maze and Fast Time Moodo made the save. Absolute Andy calms it down, but Killer Kelly asks for a Shotgun title shot… mocking Metehan’s refusal to fight women. Andy puts Metehan in his place, then tells Kelly, Maze and Moodo have to face Metehan and the Pretty Bastards… with Shotgun and tag team title shots on the line.
The Heavenly Castle has to be clean, innocent and magical… so the crowd are forced to leave. Mean.
Levaniel’s not in the best of moods this week, probably because Amale’s “internet connection isn’t working.” He’s here to talk feelings with his guest this week: Marius al-Ani. Levaniel tries to hit up Marius for information on Amale, but of course Marius is mad that it’s not about him. Levaniel admits he buttered up Marius so he didn’t get attacked, but he didn’t get Marius’ drift…
Finally Levaniel asks Marius about his winning streak, but drops in that he’s “really 6-1” because he didn’t win Shortcut to the Top. A technicality. Marius turns the topic to Jurn Simmons, but Levaniel can’t help but put his foot in it. Jurn Simmons interrupts, acknowledging Marius’ winning streak, but warns him he could lose at any time… noting that he’s lost in the past. Marius deflects by saying Jurn’s lost too… titles. Things get catty from there as Jurn basks in his status as a former Unified World Wrestling Champion. Levaniel poses, which upsets Marius, because Levaniel’s now chatting with Jurn about gym stuff and posing. Marius gets increasingly agitated, eventually cutting off Levaniel as he berates him for being a fake. It all boils down to Jurn needling Marius again, saying he’ll never win the big one, before he exited stage left as accused Marius of not knowing his own capabilities.
Backstage, Mike Schwarz is waiting for his clearance… and Alpha Kevin comes running in with it. Mike’s cleared to fight, so he begins to get ready… but we’re outta time folks!
Next week, Killer Kelly, Stephanie Maze and Fast Time Moodo take on Metehan and the Pretty Bastards… and Avalanche takes on Norman Harras in a dog collar match.
But then, we go to Absolute Andy getting the clearance papers from Mike Schwarz. Except they’re taking down the ring, and there’s no time for matches tonight. Andy’s going to find a new time and date for the match, but Mike says he’ll be happy with a disco brawl if he gets to have his match… so we get that disco brawl match next week!
While back-to-back weeks of not delivering advertised title matches is bound to annoy some, at least the episode ended with some sort of resolution. I’m very curious to see how they do the disco brawl, especially given the canon of “they’ve torn the ring down”, so it’ll likely be an empty arena match… and we’d better have the disco ball! Elsewhere, the usual wXw story-telling continued, setting up our first “big” intergender tag match for next week, while Norman Harras walked his way into more canine capers.