We’ve a pair of title matches on this week’s Loaded, as the fall-out from Lights Out continued.

We’re from Studio 2 in Newcastle, with Dave Bradshaw and James R. Kennedy on commentary… but first, a recap package from Lights Out… then General Ameen gets confused by Instagram. Joe Hendry’s also here, and he’s invited to be in the No Regrets Rumble. Hendry gets a number from an Aladdin lamp, but he doesn’t even want to know what it is…

Rory Coyle comes out, swinging his burlap sack as he’s got a pair of Sack Boys with him. Will Sony sue anyone for that term? Coyle sits in the corner a la Raven as he blows smoke up Rampage’s backside, then took credit for bringing the old Rampage back. He asks Rampage to come out for a “sequel” tonight… but before Rampage could even think about a handshake, out comes Justin Sysum.

Sysum tries to tell Rampage that he’s being manipulated, which led to Conflicted Rampage just leaving rather than having to pick between either of them. Sysum tries to leave, but he ends up getting attacked by Coyle’s Sack Boys, but he left the scene as Sysum overcame the hooded guys anyway. Backstage, the Dynamic Duo arrive to pick up their No Regrets Rumble numbers from General Ameen’s latest assistant. She’s not given a name. A jump cut takes us to General Ameen in another room, with Simon Miller and Adam Foster – he’s on the blower to No Fun Dunne, as he’s booking the Anti-Fun Police against the Defiant GM Army next week.

Mark Haskins comes in next for Ameen’s revolving door of meetings, as he’s angling for a title match… David Starr has the same idea, but he wants a fair shot. Rather than argue it out, Ameen puts the pair against each other next week for the match. Haskins is All In… I thought that was the competition?

Chris Brookes vs. Robbie X
Having not been around in Defiant since he walked out of the four-way to face PAC a few weeks ago, Chris Brookes is back against a man who’s gained a nickname: “the innovator of excellence”.

Brookes works over Robbie’s wrist early as he largely had the upper hand, catching him with a stomp in the apron before lifting Robbie into the crowd barriers. Back inside, an Irish whip from Robbie X gives him an opening, but Brookes just takes him down and worked over the Lincoln lad’s leg. There’s a half crab that forces Robbie to the ropes, ahead of a flying back senton as the one-way traffic continued.

An Axel Dieter Special from Brookes has Robbie X struggling for the ropes, as Chris goes all ZSJ on us, contorting his foe before they rolled into the ropes for a break. That seemed to be the impetus behind a comeback too, as Robbie clattered into Brookes with a dropkick, as a rather unfortunate line on commentary told us to listen to the silence to see what Newcastle thought of the match. A handstand kick from Robbie X takes Brookes to the outside for a tope, before a corkscrew splash back inside as aborted… Brookes finds a way back in with the help of the ref, before he ties up Robbie X in an Octopus hold, ending again in the ropes, before he ran into a sit-out powerbomb for a near-fall.

Brookes again uses the referee as a human shield to block an X-Clamation, but can’t avoid a roundhouse kick as Robbie was the proverbial house afire, following through with a corkscrew senton for a near-fall… before a second attempt at the X-Clamation ended with a roll-up from Brookes for the win. This was enjoyable outing, with Robbie showing a lot of fire at the end, but it wasn’t to be. ***¼

Post-match, Stevie Aaron tries to interview Chris Brookes, blaming Laura di Matteo’s recent slump in form on his attack on her last month. Brookes is still annoyed at the lack of opportunities and the fact that he has to “be in shithole Newcastle, in front of absolutely nobody”. Yep, he’s fed up with curtain jerking, and he storms off again.

They plug Loaded in Newcastle on June 1, with PAC again, and Built to Destroy on June 29, at a venue not named…

Backstage, Benji’s tearing into Conor Renshaw for low blowing Jack Sexsmith. He’s worried that Renshaw’s going to kill his reputation… then we go to Nathan Cruz trying to butter up Adam Foster, who was in the middle of doing the contract for the Haskins/Starr match. Cruz shoehorns his way into the match as he’s suddenly in the mix for a title shot.

Lizzy Styles comes out next for an open challenge defence of her title… it’s answered by Visage, who’s out to defend Kanji’s honour as they all but say that Visage is gender fluid in their little back and forth, which seemed to make Dave Bradshaw uncomfortable as hell.

Defiant Women’s Championship: Lizzy Styles (c) vs. Visage
Visage begins by charging into Styles in the corner with back elbows, only to get caught with a running uppercut.

A flying hair mare takes Styles down, as does a bicycle knee, but she’s back in with a clothesline as she begins to run her mouth again. Well, there’ll be a few audio silences if any of this makes it into a recap package! Styles rips off Visage’s eyelashes, only to get pulled down into a crossface as Visage almost took the win. A rope break saves Lizzy, who came back with an uppercut, taking Visage outside for a choke by the ring post. Back inside, the wig’s thrown to the face as Visage unsighted Styles, following up with a standing leg lariat before a cartwheel something or other led to a near-fall.

Lizzy’s back with a poke to the eye and a German suplex, folding Visage in half, before a double-jump spear out of the corner put the challenger back in front. Another roundhouse misses as Styles charges Visage into the corner, rolling back into a bicycle knee… and that’s enough for the flat ending. As a match, this was okay – but I think there’s a long way to go for Defiant to “accept” intergender in any way here. **

Post-match, Styles jumps on commentary to enter herself into the No Regrets Rumble.

We fade backstage as Gabriel Kidd’s picking his No Regrets Rumble number. He gets number thirty, and brags about it, so I’m half expecting to be out instantly…

Simon Miller shows General Ameen how to post a video to YouTube… then gets interrupted by Adam Foster showing him the contract he made up earlier. Foster gets chewed out for his WrestleMania-like booking, as Ameen really didn’t want the multi-man match, but Miller calms them all down because they’re all doing a wrestle next week.

John Klinger’s picking his Rumble number… but he’s turning into a creep as he demands Ameen’s PA’s number. I must have missed that part of the Macho Man’s gimmick from back in the day.

Defiant Tag Team Championship: Aussie Open (Kyle Fletcher & Mark Davis) vs. South Coast Connection (Ashley Dunn & Kelly Sixx) (c)
A rematch from nearly two months ago, as Aussie Open have a shot at regaining the titles they shockingly lost to Will Ospreay’s mates.

The fact we’ve got a little over five minutes left on the VOD when the bell rings might tell you this isn’t going to be a mat classic… The Aussies jump into the champions as Sixx and Dunn were pinned against the ropes with some right hands, before they powdered to the outside. They’re quickly met out there and thrown back in as the bell sounds, with Dunn getting stomped on in the corner. Kelly Sixx tries to come in with a belt shot, but his swing and miss earned him a double-team Go To Sleep as Dunn ended up taking an assisted Aussie Arrow for a near-fall.

Sixx broke that cover up and gets sent outside for a tope, as Dunn continued to take a beating… until Sixx dragged him outside for respite. Kyle tries to plancha to the outside, only to get caught with a superkick as the champions finally looked to make a comeback. Duelling enziguiri catch Davis, who’s taken into the corner for a dropkick for a near-fall, before Sixx looked to finish off Davis with the Roppongi Vice Strong Zero.

Fletcher breaks that up as he looked to take Sixx into the corner with an Aussie Arrow… but Kyle’s thrown outside as Ashley Dunn slid in a title belt. Davis gets hold of it and does the “shall I?” threat on Sixx who was begging off. Eventually, Davis thinks better of it, but Sixx gets the second belt slid in, which he quickly used to put away Davis. A cheap finish, as the Aussies’ hot start ended up being undone by some more shenanigans. **¾

The show goes off air on that note, with graphics building up next week: David Starr, Mark Haskins and Nathan Cruz face off in a three-way to determine Rampage’s next challenger… Justin Sysum vs. Rory Coyle… Natalie Sykes takes on Ruby Radley… and Simon Miller returns to wrestling (in that trios match with the Anti-Fun Police).

The road to No Regrets next month started here with plenty of less-than-subtle pointers for the rumble match, and some other seedlings for the path ahead. I’m not crazy about Rory Coyle supposedly being done with the title picture after “getting the old Rampage back”, but the new story with Sysum seems to be something that’ll further Coyle’s character in front of this audience. Something tells me that Chris Brookes could well be a dark horse for the Rumble, but I’d also not be shocked if he ended up with a lousy draw and started the match itself.