What’s the best way possible to start the year if you’re a fan of the British wrestling scene? Well, if you’re a fan of ATTACK! and Fight Club: PRO… how about a cross-over show?
That’s what we got on January 7 as FC:P and ATTACK! came together at Fight Club: PRO’s home base of the Fixxion Warehouse in Wolverhampton… and barely 72 hours later, the whole thing was available on-demand. A cracking turnaround time as usual from the ATTACK! and FC:P crew…
A new-ish video intro featuring both rosters starts us off, and brings back memories of Finders Keepers with the ATTACK! Club Pro logo. It’s straight into action too…
#CCK (Chris Brookes & Kid Lykos) vs. Ryan Smile & Mark Andrews
#CCK give Shay Purser a hug – and I’m already hoping the heel ref stuff is toned down compared to the latter half of the MistleTour shows…
We finally got going with Brookes working over Andrews with a wristlock, but it gets reversed and Brookes forces his way to the ropes for a break. More of the same, with Brookes trying to force chants of “tap”… to little avail, as he eventually tagged in Kid Lykos, whose new Power Rangers-esque body suit just looks weird on him.
Andrews armdrags Lykos all over the place, before Ryan Smile tags in and stomps away on the Wolf’s hand. Smile and Andrews double-team #CCK with charges in the corner, before simultaneously dropping the pair with a pair of topes that wiped out a fan in the crowd! Back inside, Andrews gets a standing moonsault on Brookes for a two-count, but #CCK come back with a combination of moves including a back senton from an Electric chair by Lykos as they turn things around.
Lykos and Brookes corner Andrews, before a full nelson slam into a full stomp from Lykos gets a near-fall. Brookes returns to give Andrews a wet willie, but Andrews finally comes back with a back flip into a dropkick to Lykos as he finally tags in Smile once more… and my word, Smile unloaded on Brookes with kicks and uppercuts. Lykos flips out of a back suplex, but ends up dumping Brookes with an inadvertent stunner before a Blue Thunder bomb gets a near-fall.
Brookes takes an enziguiri from Andrews as Smile yells out Shelton Benjamin’s old theme en route to a near-fall. Smile hits the ring post as he misses on a Stinger splash, and that leaves him open for an assisted swinging suplex that almost got them the win as Andrews made the save at the last second. Smile launches a comeback, but gets caught in a Gory Bomb x Blockbuster for another near-fall on this night of collaborations.
More forearms from Smile are cut off by a leaping knee from Lykos, before another swinging suplex from Brookes and a moonsault from Lykos lead to another near-fall – this time with the referee seemingly slow-counting the heels! Lykos gets sent to the outside where he whacks Smile with his baking tray, and that leaves Andrews by himself to fend off #CCK. Andrews tries to powerbomb Lykos, whose latest brainbuster attempt is turned into a Stundog Millionaire, then a shiranui, before a slingshot to the floor from Andrews takes out Brookes. Smile charges at a cornered Lykos again, before Andrews monkey flips the wolf into the path of a Smile superkick… but Brookes returns to break up the count.
Out of nowhere, Lykos catches Andrews with a springboard Spanish Fly, before Smile’s attempt at a handspring is caught by Brookes… who then takes one half of a double- springboard back elbow, before Smile launches into them his customary over-the-turnbuckles tope con hilo.
Andrews looks to finish off with a shooting star press, but evil ref Shay gets in the way and lets Brookes get to his feet. Andrews leaps over the referee, only to get booted low, and then a roll-up helps Brookes secure the win… and a hug from everyone’s favourite referee. A really good opener, with some nice exchanges from four guys who always put on a good outing… but you know what I’m going to moan about if this heel ref finish continues on this show! ***½
Killian Jacobs vs. Splits McPins
Jacobs is a regular in promotions around south Wales and the Midlands, and has faced the likes of Travis Banks, Chris Brookes and Marty Scurll in 2016… but this is his biggest exposure to date. Unfortunately, against Splits McPins, I wouldn’t expect Jacobs to get a shock win…
We’ve got Joel Allen as the referee here… but since this is an ATTACK! show there’s still no ring bell!
Jacobs starts with a headlock and a shoulder block to McPins as we get a flurry of one-counts in the opening exchanges. Killian cartwheels, McPins rolls, as the champion lands a slam en route to a top rope bowling ball drop onto Jacobs. Speaking of rolls, we get a rolling senton from McPins for a near-fall as he took over, dropkicking Jacobs to the apron where a bowling ball strike knocked him into the crowd.
A tope follows – and if you’re wondering why the use of a bowling ball doesn’t translate to a disqualification… all I can say is “because wrestling”. Jacobs comes back with a springboard flip dive to the floor a la Chuck Mambo, but back in the ring he’s spiked with a Flatliner by McPins, who followed in with some uppercuts in the corner.
Another bowling ball shot into the corner knocks down Jacobs, but he wriggles out of a Dominator, and drops Splits with an enziguiri… then stops short of the turnbuckles as he rolls back into another enziguiri. Ah, nevermind, Splits dumps him with a clothesline, but Jacobs comes back and saves his footing en-route to an outside-in rana.
Jacobs continued to impress as he missed with a corkscrew moonsault, and that was almost his lact act as McPins dumped him with a Fireman’s carry flapjack for a near-fall, before a belly-to-back piledriver (Jig N Tonic, MK Ultra, Finish Her… whatever you wanna call it) did the job. This was all kinds of fun, and Jacobs did not look out of place here. ATTACK!… book him more please! ***
Up next: EC-Drew! Today he took the form of Drew-ven – complete with a Raven-esque leather jacket. Drew-ven issues an Extremely Open Challenge for the ATTACK! 24/7 title, and the crowd already suspect that referee Shay will get involved… but he just flips them off. Instead, we get Alice in Chains’ “Man In The Box” playing, and out comes Clint Margera as Tommy Dreamer!
ATTACK! 24/7 Championship: Drew Parker (c) vs. Clint Margera
If you know your classic ECW, you’d expect this to be one sided… especially since the Fixxion crowd chanted “you can’t beat him”.
Drew-ven hits Mar-Dreamer with the belt from behind and they immediately go to the outside… exactly where Margera is at his most comfortable. Margera sprays a fan’s drink at Parker and grabs a keyboard from under the ring… and just like New Jack back in the day, that keyboard went over Parker’s head, resulting in a complete loss of control. And Alt. And most likely every other key…
A chair comes into play next, as does a staple gun… but Parker immediately gets rid of it and the pair fight towards the back of the room, where that conspicuously-placed ladder is used as I *think* Margera sends Parker’s head into it. Just as I type that, the crowd chant “this sounds awesome”, so they come back towards the ring where Margera grabs a sheet of wood and props it across two chairs. Hey, tables can be expensive…
Parker jumps on Margera, then runs into the ring to grab the staple gun… and yes, Margera takes some staples to the chest. An avalanche splash gets Parker a two-count, so he goes back under the ring for more plunder, grabbing a steel chair that Margera crashed into via a drop toe hold. Another drop toe hold into the chair sends the seat flying for a near-fall, as Parker sets up Margera on the makeshift table on the outside. He misses a senton and crashes through the wood, which gives Margera a chance to get his wind back, and eventually gets a two-count himself after rolling Parker back inside.
A Tree of Woe follows as Margera sets up a chair in front of Parker for a diving dropkick… before a DDT onto a chair was blocked as Parker claimed another two-count. Parker goes all Paul Robinson with windmill punches before bringing in a gift bag full of drawing pins… or as the crowd called them “Disney thumb tacks”. Margera countered a DDT onto the tacks, but ended up taking a DDT elsewhere in the ring for a two-count. Clint was finally successful with his DDT, as Parker took a faceful of pins for just a two, before a death valley driver onto the tacks ended Parker’s run as champion. For a plunder match, this was pretty good – nonsense, but great! **½
Hopefully this isn’t the end of Extremely Confused Drew – there’s plenty more ECW alumni for him to parody!
Clint gets the title belt as we see Drew Parker’s drawing pin-riddled shoulder… but as Margera celebrates, Shay looks on with evil intentions.
ATTACK! 24/7 Championship: Clint Margera (c) vs. Shay Purser
Sure enough, our evil ref hangs around and kicks him low, then counts his own pinfall to win the 24/7 title for a second time! (Not Rating)
Yeah, that twist at the end did not go down well, but it only served to increase the crowd’s hatred of the ref.
Our next match started when ring announcer Jim Lee asked the crowd if they were having fun. You’d think he’d learn by now… that triggered the arrival of the Anti Fun Police, solely represented today by Chief Deputy (Damian) Dunne, who once again cancelled fun.
Chief Deputy Dunne vs. Omari
After his “main show” debut for Fight Club: PRO in their Infinity tournament, Omari was getting another look-in here. Dunne took the fight to him at the bell with kicks and punches in the corner, before a leap over and a cartwheel took Omari away from his foe. A baseball slide sees Omari trip Dunne, before he returned to the ring and took the Chief Deputy down with a dropkick and an avalanche. Omari tries a springboard clothesline, but a forearm from Dunne cuts him down in mid-air, giving the Anti-Fun Police the advantage once more.
Dunne chops away at Omari in the corner, before kicking the middle rope into the youngster’s face to collect another near-fall. After withstanding some double axehandles, Omari fights back and uses a leg lariat to knock down Dunne, before landing a shoulder tackle and a leg lariat in the corner, then finally another dropkick to take Dunne to the floor. Omari looks to fly, but he’s stopped by Dunne on the apron, before recovering and landing what I guess was meant to be a springboard stunner from the inside to the floor? The second dive went off without a hitch, in the form of a tope con hilo, before Omari deadlifted Dunne off the ground with a gutwrench suplex for a near-fall.
Dunne wriggles out of a slam before landing a knee strike to an on-rushing Omari, as a draping DDT off the top rope gets him a near-fall. A series of slaps from Dunne serve to only rile Omari as they tee off on each other, ending with an Omari superkick and a spear from Dunne. Omari kicks out at two though, and looks for a swinging side slam, only for Dunne to work free and land a sunset flip after originally attempting a codebreaker.
After kicking out from that, Omari finished off Dunne with another collaboration move – this time a swinging side End of Days – and picked up the win from there. I’m chalking off Omari’s Infinity appearance since multi-man matches are hard to impress in, but with this performance I wouldn’t be too shocked to see Omari become a major player in the years to come. This guy is impressive and is one to watch in 2017! ***
Dan Moloney & Pete Dunne vs. Moustache Mountain (Trent Seven & Tyler Bate)
This was our advertised main event, and hey, it’s a quarter of the WWE UK Championship Tournament – a fact that gets a big cheer from the crowd! Moloney uses his forearm to buff a bald fan’s head, whilst Dunne was appearing despite being banned from ATTACK! as he’s the current Fight Club: PRO champion.
Moustache Mountain’s entrance as featured something else I never expected to see: Tyler Bate making out with an emu. Good to see Emu’s not calmed down after Rod Hull’s passing back in 1999!
Bate and Seven outsmart the heels’ jumpstart, only to get knocked down with a pair of forearms as Dunne and Moloney mock the moustache twiddling. Seven kneels down in the ropes so Bate can fly over him with a tope to the pair on the outside, before he takes over on both Dunne and Moloney whilst Seven poses for the crowd. Trent finally goes airborne with a low-pe that sends Dunne and Moloney into the wall.
Bate stays on top of them with a moonsault off the middle turnbuckle, before doing a spinaroonie of all things… with Emu snogging on top of that, I think Tyler just wants to get GIF’d a lot, and finally the match gets underway officially! Dunne rolls up Bate for a near-fall, then kicks his arm away as the FC:P champion unleashes on Bate with a back suplex in between working on the left arm. Trent breaks up a double wristlock, as he then trades slaps with Dunne – much to the confusion of that one guy who perhaps only watches these guys in PROGRESS. Seven invites Peter to throw some more forearms, before a straight right hand decks Dunne. That was simple!
Dunne cowers in the corner and finds himself on the receiving end of an overhand cricket chop, before Moloney comes in and drops Seven with a fireman’s carry facebuster. The crowd suddenly spot Dan’s small boots, but Tyler Bate’s right hand quickly makes sure that the crowd’s chanting about more than footwear. Bate comes back with a Giant Airplane Swing to the heels, before ending with a Samoan drop and a slingshot that takes Dunne to the floor in a fresh twist to that move. Seven calls for a “successful double clothesline”, and wouldn’t you know it, it worked! A double suplex also works for a near-fall, before Peter returns and grabs Seven and Bate’s moustache… at least until a pair of headbutts free them.
Dunne takes a pair of German suplexes, which would have ended the match had Bate’s bridging suplex not been smashed by Dan Moloney giving Trent a German suplex onto the bridge. That just makes the crowd focus on Moloney’s footwear whilst he trades slaps with Seven… all whilst Peter and Tyler do the same in the ring. The latter pair stood up to trade right hands and slaps, and Bate won that particular battle… just in time to see Trent yet again slap the ring post. Moloney gets in the ring and dumps Bate with an Electric Chair Powerbomb, before a Samoan Driver from Seven is broken up before a count can be made. A release suplex from Dunne takes Trent down, but he snaps back with a piledriver for a two-count, but once Moloney gets back to his feet, the heels again take over.
After attempting a double superplex, Pete and Dan bite away at Trent’s fingers, before finishing the move… but Trent popped back up, only to run into some big boots. Bate met a similar fate as this quickly descended into a hard-hitting striking battle that ended with a Koppo kick from Bate, then a double stomp from Dunne. More strikes followed until all four men booted each other together as the crowd erupted!
Bate and Moloney again exchange strikes, before Seven saved Tyler from another electric chair powerbomb, as a Dragon suplex should have gotten Moustache Mountain the win, but god-damn it Shay’s playing heel ref and holds up the count. Thankfully, back-up referee Joel Allen comes in and throws Shay outside… and I guess he takes over? Another Dragon suplex to Dunne and a piledriver follows, before a scoop tombstone piledriver gets a two-count… as this time Shay stops the count to bite away on Joel’s hand.
Trent and Tyler stare down Shay, but Dunne and Moloney come from behind and score a roll-up for a fast-counted three. A cheap as hell win, but at least they (somewhat) progressed the heel ref stuff here. ***¾
Referee Shay celebrates by holding the 24/7 title in his mouth like he’s Pete Dunne… and he’s quickly surrounded by Joel and Moustache Mountain. Chris Brookes and Kid Lykos make the save, as Shay takes the microphone to declare that this is “his house”. At least, I think that’s what he said, as the crowd drowned him out.
Joel Allen throws Shay, then Chris Brookes to the floor, before getting the microphone himself. Allen suggests a six-man tag to get some revenge for Shay’s poor refereeing… but who’s going to officiate? The crowd chant for ring announcer Jim to referee, so Joel takes off his shirt… but instead of the ring announcer getting the gig, Trent pulls a fan from the crowd to be the special guest referee.
Warren – aka @BritIndy on Twitter – takes over the duties, and enters the ring in the zebra stripes. This is surreal… he gets the crowd counting and our impromptu main event is underway!
Moustache Mountain (Trent Seven & Tyler Bate) & Joel Allen vs. #CCK (Chris Brookes & Kid Lykos) & Shay Purser
The match starts with all six men on the outside, so guest referee Warren just lays across the middle ropes. He finally starts the count as Trent and Lykos trade chops. While Joel Allen lays into Shay with elbows.
Tyler peppers Brookes with punches by the side of the ring, but he takes his boot off and gets stomped on by Brookes. That probably wasn’t a wise move, taking some of your gear off, Tyler! That bare foot is a massive target on Tyler, and he’s quickly worn down for a wet willie from Chris Brookes, before Shay Purser comes in.
Bate spears Purser to the mat, but #CCK run in to break it up as Warren loses whatever control he had on the match. Lykos grabs a rear chinlock on Bate, and that almost forces the submission via the old-school arm dropping, but Tyler fights back briefly, only to be taken into the corner yet again.
Tyler fights free with a series of forearms, before dropping Brookes with an enziguiri. Trent tags in and chops his way through #CCK, as Lykos blocks an overhand cricket chop with an enziguiri of his own, before an electric chair codebreaker helps Lykos to a near-fall. Shay tags into work over Trent, which doesn’t seem like a smart idea, so he brings Lykos back in, whose brainbuster attempt was equally misguided.
Chris Brookes comes in to help as Joel Allen does the usual babyface thing of distracting the referee on accident, but Trent reverses the double-suplex and sends #CCK flying. Trent tags in Joel to a loud cheer, and my God, Allen unleashes on #CCK before Shay tries some Kojima-like forearms and chops… to zero effect. Joel goes all Kojima and fires up as he’s used as a human battering ram onto Purser, before the babyfaces score a trio of chokeslams for a trio of near-falls. The ring clears as we’re left with just Shay and Joel… Purser blocks an Allen stunner (which probably wouldn’t have been pretty, if you saw Joel at PROGRESS in Brixton!), then kicks him low.
Purser celebrates too early and gets caught by a pop-up uppercut by Moustache Mountain, who then get jumped by #CCK, only for Trent to make his own comeback with chops to both of the former tag team champions. A pair of tombstones are attempted, but they hold up as Joel climbs the top rope… and oh my God in heaven, referee Joel Allen hits a double Indytaker onto #CCK. There’s the receipt for the spots the Young Bucks stole! (check Joel Allen’s appearance on Morgan Webster’s Wrestling Friends podcast for that particular backstory)
Joel keeps up with shots to Shay, and gets a suplex (apt, since he runs SPLX apparel…), as Trent covers Chris Brookes for the win! I guess that’s who took the fall, as otherwise Joel Allen would be the new 24/7 champion… but Joel gets the belt, so I guess he took the fall! This was beautiful nonsense. Shay Purser has had training, but his stuff was kept simple, as was Joel’s – and this was the perfect main event that blended wrestlers and accepted characters without “exposing” anybody too much. Just don’t give this to Jim Cornette, okay? ***¼
Joel celebrates with the ATTACK! 24/7 title, but then he realises he’s a cornered man…
ATTACK! 24/7 Championship: Joel Allen (c) vs. Warren
Trent and Tyler deck Joel with straight punches, then Trent throws Warren onto Joel – Tyler counts the fall, and Warren/@BritIndy ends the show as the 24/7 champion! (Not Rating)
Speaking of beautiful nonsense… after the “match” Joel shakes Warren’s hand despite having been screwed out of the title, before cutting a tongue-in-cheek promo over his lengthy title reign, as we end the show with a fist-pumping dance-off and a spot of beer drinking!
What Worked: The collaboration between ATTACK! and Fight Club: PRO was a perfect melding of two really hot promotions – and although this was an ATTACK!-branded show, this was really an ATTACK! show with a Fight Club crowd. That advertised main event was quite the match too, until the cheap ending, but we’ve already gone through that.
What Didn’t: The heel ref act wasn’t as overplayed as it was on the MistleTour shows, and whilst they progressed it with Shay winning and losing the 24/7 title, this is a storyline that needs to play out before it starts to get the wrong kind of heat. I have faith that ATTACK! will do this right, but it’s the one thing that’s sticking out for me.
Thumbs: Up – some of the nonsense may not be your cup of tea (hi Jim!), but if you like ATTACK! and Fight Club: PRO, this is a no-brainer!