We’re outside for the latest episode of UWA Wrestling Rampage, and my word it makes for an odd atmosphere!
Yes, UWA’s ring is outdoors at the Bulldog Bash – a biker rally near Stratford-upon-Avon in England, as we start this show with a title match: Doug Williams putting his UWA title on the line against Jonny Storm… with a heavily-mulleted referee!
UWA Championship: Doug Williams (c) vs. Jonny Storm
Williams goes for a slingshot back suplex, but Storm holds on as they roll down on the mat, and this looks just weird – a British wrestling TV show taped in the middle of a fair!
Storm takes down Williams with a dropkick, but Doug hits back with massive back body drop, and a clothesline to take his challenger to the outside. Storm tries to walk off, but returns to the ring and works over Doug briefly, only to be taken back to the corner with a Stinger splash.
A floatover suplex gets Doug a two-count from our biker gang referee, as the champion outdoes the challenger with technical holds. We get a low-blow from Storm, which gets no DQ or any reaction from the referee, before a middle rope clothesline gets a two-count from an unsighted referee.
Storm shoves the referee and gets pushed back for his troubles. Williams lands another suplex for a three-count – except Storm gets his shoulder up, so it’s really only a two. A sidewalk slam gets a two-count as Storm grabs the ropes, before a tiltawhirl headscissors nearly takes Doug to the outside, where Storm follows up with a flying body press (or a “shooting star press”, according to our commentary team).
The biker ref joins them outside, where a ‘rana from Storm off the apron takes down Doug. Back inside, Williams press slams Storm and dumps him onto the top rope, before they go outside once more. Storm gets whipped into the ring post, then the table that’d been left outside the ring.
They repeat that a few times as Storm gets dispatched to the outside, where a tope from Williams sees the pair land in some fans’ picnic! Storm hits a split-legged moonsault off the top rope for a near-fall, before Storm goes back up top for a body splash that earns him another two-count. Some mounted punches in the corner from Williams get turned into a running Liger Bomb, and Doug retains the title. Well, that was a good match, in a thoroughly-odd setting… ***
We’re taken to another part of the fairgrounds, and we see 2 Far Gone with the bike they won from Duke Lynch last week. It’s Paul Tyrell and a now bleach-blonde Steve Morocco, and the champions declare that their match is about “hurting the Death Squad”.
We return from commercial to see… a promo with Phil Powers. Good lord. Does he have to be on EVERY show? Powers claims he’s been in hospital, talking to “two old fogeys” about how Phil Powers has become a loser. The story turns to how Powers used to be a dork at school, always coming second to his brother. Should a promotion’s top babyface be even jokingly-disrespectful to seniors? This ends up being an announcement of Powers vs. Sloan at that Barking show, before Powers gave us this gem: “as the old quote said, Paul Sloan, I’m not going to quote it, but, I didn’t teach you everything I know…”
Powers looked like a clone of Peter Andre here (Google him, kids!), wth an oiled-up chest whilst wearing a pair of Chinos, and of course, he ended his promo by yelling, because someone still hasn’t told him that yelling doesn’t make a passable promo better.
We return to ringside as both of the Tiny Girls emerge with 2 Far Gone. Apparently this isn’t a title match… it’s just for their bike, with the Tiny Girls apparently being put up as a reward should the champions win again. They shrugged it off like it was nothing – I guess they’re always put up as prizes in matches?
The cameras go on a tour of the Bulldog Bash, as we see a few people getting tattoos. Apparently this was the Tiny Girls’ day out, and of course, they don’t get a tattoo. We do get a lot of extreme close-up shots as this seems to be doubling as footage for their modelling portfolios…
Why on earth are we seeing two models sitting in the middle of a Wall of Death, in the middle of a wrestling show?!
They take us back to last week – so we haven’t skipped forward! – and a replay of how 2 Far Gone won the bike, with the help of the unnamed bodybuilder. We’re taken to ringside as 2 Far Gone’s out with the Death Squad’s old bike, but the unnamed guy from last week isn’t around.
Weirdly, the Death Squad don’t get much of a reaction from their “home crowd”… and it sounds like they’ve dubbed a prior entrance over this, as we hear the Tiny Girls taunting 2 Far Gone, but their mouths didn’t move.
2 Far Gone (Paul Tyrell & Steve Morocco) vs. Death Squad (Duke Lynch & Mark Myers)
Lynch locks up with Tyrell, but the smaller guy takes down Duke with a dropkick, then a monkey flip, before Lynch retaliated with a press slam that sends Tyrell into the crowd, where he gets some playful taps from the Tiny Girls.
Back inside, Morocco takes a clothesline from Myers, before a low blow and a shot with a beer can to the head rocks the former champion. Tyrell grabs a chinlock, but Myers reverses out into a wristlock as we go to commercial. Returning from break, Tyrell’s still working over Myers, as we get more distraction that leads to some double-teaming. Tyrell lands a top rope elbow for a near-fall, but Myers comes back with a slam and a back body drop out of the corner. Myers clotheslines Tyrell to the floor, as the Tiny Girls again get involved in a way that wrecks any “blood feud” feeling to this match.
Morocco misses a double knee drop off the middle rope, as Myers counters with a splash off the middle rope for a near-fall. The Death Squad come back with a hanging suplex from Lynch to Morocco, but the bleach blonde Morocco ends up ramming Lynch’s head into an exposed turnbuckle.
We get some double-teaming on Steve Morocco as the tables turned from last week, but on the outside Morocco made another comeback with a dropkick on Myers. That suddenly ends when Tyrell gets press slammed onto his own partner, before Lynch works an armbar back in the ring on Tyrell. On the outside, we see a piledriver from Morocco onto Myers… which is instantly no-sold, as Tyrell’s crotched on the top rope by Lynch. Morocco gets one of the title belts and looks to walk out on the match, but instead they return to the ring, where Morocco takes down Lynch with what’d be refined in later years into a Slingblade (but really seemed to be a confusion between a clothesline and a sleeperhold!)
Paul Tyrell accidentally nails Morocco with a tag title belt, and then just goes onto the apron rather than clearing up after his own mess. On the outside, the Tiny Girls again attack Morocco, who gets distracted as Tyrell takes tombstone piledriver from Lynch, followed by a Sheffield Hammer… and the Death Squad thankfully end this mess. They get their bike back, and that’s it. *½
Well, this was another mess – the outdoor venue seemed to hurt this match, but it wasn’t like their first match was anything to write home about. The Death Squad leave on their bike – almost running down some people in the crowd – as the show signed off.
This was a weird experiment, that due to a lack of context, just didn’t work. It was painfully evident that the crowd in attendance weren’t wrestling fans, and the sheer indifference towards the natural babyfaces just said it all. Remember, last week, we were told that this “outdoor” show would be several weeks away… but by this point, the UWA was heading towards the end of it’s run on TV, with a “best of show” being promoted for the near-future in commentary, and that’s never a good sign!